how to reframe your envy and thrive
Whether it’s Lana Del Rey or Olivia Rodrigo: jealousy and envy are a common theme in many song lyrics. While we belt out songs with our whole hearts as if they were national anthems, in reality we would never admit to having these feelings, let alone show them.
Why should we? In monotheistic religions, envy is seen as a sin, socially it is seen as unattractive, and for some it is a synonym for being a bad person.
We think that we should reframe envy. And we also think that you can put a stop to envy by changing your perspective.
Let's recognize and deal with envy as a sign of inferiority complexes, a lack of reflection, and a lack of effort to improve oneself.
If you finding yourself struggling with evny, this article can help you to change your perspective- even if its a tiny little bit.
We tend to take superficial accomplishments as a measurement of a good life
Everyone has been dealt a different set of cards when being born. Your timeline with 28 or 38 may not be the same as your friend's one. While you barely just finished your diploma, another one can have a stable job, an own family or a business, or even all of that.
Are you less than because of it? No. As long we are alive we can take steps to the desired route. When we hear or see certain accomplishments we often come to the conclusion that everything in the other person's life must be perfectly fine. Rather than seeing a certain accomplishment isolated: Can you imagine how much work an accomplishment can take? Do you know what this person has to sacrifice to get to the place you blindly envy? And why do you conclude that one success in the other timeline makes a whole perfect life?
And dont forget: It's impossible to know what it took for the other person to get to where they are now.
Use your strengths to your advantage
Everyone has traits or circumstances that set them apart from others. Learn and work on yourself to acknowledge these traits and learn to maximize them.
We have a negative self-concept.
When we envy others, we automatically take ourselves down. By envying others we assume that others are better than us. This can come from low self-worth. In this case, therapy or deep self reflection can help to identify our current self-concept and belief systems about ourselves we accepted through others .
We aren’t grateful enough
Sometimes we don’t realize the good things that surround us. We keep keeping an eye on the blessing of others without taking a second to look out for things we take for granted. Your current state can or maybe the dream of someone else. Please acknowledge that. Practicing regular gratefulness can have a positive influence on our health and gives us a better view of our lives. Plus: Gratefulness will always beat envy.
Learn from envy
Envy CAN be also a good thing. Feeling envy in a certain situation or towards a person indicates to us what we are missing, what are our goals in life, and in which areas in our life we have to give more focus.
